Buy something small and personal that will not stay in their home for ever. That could be a food or drink they like, a better version of something they already use, or a modest gift clearly chosen for them. "Don't get me anything" almost never means "don't think of me". The person is refusing a certain kind of gift, usually clutter, cost or fuss, and the right present avoids all three.
The people who ask this online want to respect the wish. On r/AskUK, "Gift ideas for Dad who has everything and wants nothing?" received 423 comments. "Gift for the wife that wants nothing?" received 253, and "Dad says he doesn't want anything for Christmas" another 147. Each question was written by someone who cares enough not to ignore the request.
What 'don't get me anything' usually means
"I have too much stuff." This is the most common meaning, and it grows with age. They are not against receiving gifts. They are against owning more things. The problem is not the gift. It is one more object.
"I don't want you to spend money on me." This is often true between parents and adult children, or between friends who earn very different amounts. The discomfort is about the money. The thought is welcome.
"I don't want the fuss." Some people do not like being the centre of attention. It is the ceremony around the gift they would rather avoid.
"I don't want to be disappointed, or to make you feel bad." This one is quieter, and more common than people admit. Someone who has received several gifts in a row that did not suit them may start refusing gifts altogether.
These four meanings need four different responses, and "just get them a voucher" only answers the second.
Dad says he doesn't want anything for Christmas
With a dad, it is usually the first or second meaning. He has what he needs, or he would rather you did not spend money on him. Buy something that gets used up, like good coffee or a bottle he would not buy himself. Or a food he loves, from a maker he has not tried. Food and drink do not need storing. For someone who has everything, storage is the real objection.
The other option is to replace something, not add something. Choose a good version of something he uses every day, like the worn wallet or the old garden gloves. That way, the cupboard does not get fuller.
A wife or girlfriend who doesn't want anything
Here it is more often the third or fourth meaning. She may not want the fuss of a big moment when she opens a gift. Or she may have received gifts that did not suit her, and would rather not risk another. Spending more does not solve either problem.
Change the way you give the gift instead. Leave it out for her on an ordinary morning. With nobody watching, there is no ceremony, and someone who dislikes fuss often loves being thought of. Then choose a gift that fits her exactly, rather than a big one. It should be something that could only have been chosen for her, which shows you were paying attention.
Someone who has everything and wants nothing
When both are true, the choice is the most limited, but also the clearest. A small gift answers the objection about spending. A personal gift answers the objection "you didn't really think about it". A short-lived gift answers the objection about clutter, and removes the guilt of storing it. Short-lived means something to eat or drink, something that gets used up, or something seasonal.
The target is narrow, but it is real. It is also close to the opposite of what a bestseller list offers. Popular gifts are designed to look generous, not to suit one person who has asked for less. We have written separately about someone who has everything.
What not to do
Do not buy something big to prove they were worth it. It turns their clear wish into a duty. Now they have to look delighted about something they said they did not want.
Do not buy nothing at all, unless you are certain they meant it. Some people do mean it. Most do not. A small gift, clearly chosen with care, is almost never unwelcome.
Do not turn it into a negotiation. Asking "are you sure?" three times makes the person defend something they only said once.
Someone who says they want nothing has told you what they do not want. That is useful information, and it narrows the search: small, personal, short-lived and specific to them. Because the choice is so limited, scrolling a category page rarely finds the right gift, and starting from the person works better. Tell us who they are and what you want to spend, then swipe through gifts that already suit them.
Part of a series on the four kinds of people who are "impossible to shop for". Start with the overview, or read about someone who has everything and someone you barely know.
Questions people ask
Should I get them something if they said no gifts?
Usually, yes, as long as it is small. Most people who say "don't get me anything" mean "don't spend much" or "don't add to my things". They do not mean "don't think of me". A modest gift, clearly chosen for them, respects the request and still marks the day. If they have said it firmly and more than once, a card with a real message is enough.
What is a good gift that is not clutter?
Something that gets used up, or that replaces something worn out. Good food or drink, a candle, toiletries they would not buy themselves, a better version of an everyday thing, or an experience you share. None of these leaves anything to store. Choose by what they already enjoy, so the gift feels picked for them, not just for leaving nothing behind.
Is a voucher a good gift for someone who wants nothing?
Only if their objection is about you spending, and even then it can look like giving up. For someone who wants fewer things, a voucher they will use up works better than a general one. A favourite café or restaurant is a good choice. Add a note saying why you chose it, so it shows thought as well as money.