For most people, the problem with Christmas shopping is not the shopping. The problem is the order in which it gets done. The list is not too long. The trouble is that people try to do it all in one tiring evening in mid-December, when every decision is rushed and many go wrong.
How do you plan Christmas gifts for the whole family?
Write down every name before you look at any gifts. Sort the names into three groups: people you know well, people you know a bit, and people you buy for out of obligation. Then set one total budget and divide it. Buy for the obligation group first. Leave the people you love until last, when you still have time to choose well.
One afternoon in October, done in the right order, achieves more than three evenings in December. Here is the order.
Write down the people first, and nothing else
Do not write gifts yet. Write names.
This step sounds too simple, but it is the one that goes wrong most often. People start looking at gifts before they finish counting the names. They buy well for the first four, then discover eleven more. By then, the budget and their patience have both run out.
So write down every name. Include the awkward ones, such as the neighbour, the colleague, or the person you swap gifts with out of habit. You are not promising to buy for all of them yet. You are just making sure no name surprises you later.
Sort them into three groups
Group one: the people you know well. Family and close friends. These gifts need the most thought, and they deserve it. They are the reason to start early, not to rush at the end.
Group two: the people you know a bit. In-laws, colleagues, the friend you see twice a year. For them, one true detail is enough to choose well.
Group three: the obligations. These are gift swaps that happen only because they always have. Nobody involved expects the gift to touch them.
The split shows you where to put your attention. Most people spread their effort evenly, so group one gets less thought than it should and group three gets far more than anyone wanted.
Set a total, then divide it
Decide the total before you decide the price of any single gift. If you set an amount per person and add it up, you only find out in January what you really spent.
The money does not need to be split evenly between the groups, and it should not be. Group three does not need much. A small, really nice gift is the right choice, and spending more does not make anyone's Christmas better.
Do group three first
This step may seem backwards, but it is the biggest single improvement you can make.
Most people start with the people they care about most, because that is the interesting part. Then the obligation gifts are left until the end, in December, when there is no time. That is how the last third of the list ends up bought in a rush at a petrol station.
Group three is also the easiest to do in one go. It is mostly one decision, repeated. Choose one type of gift that suits people you hardly know, then work through the names. One hour is enough, and it clears the part of the list that causes the real panic.
Then the people you know a bit
As with anyone you know only a little, a gift based on one true detail beats a general gift that would suit anyone. You almost always know one such detail. Perhaps they garden, they love a particular TV show, or they have just moved house.
Leave the people you love until last, while you still have time
By this point, most of the list is done, the budget is still under control and there is no deadline pressure. That is exactly when people choose well.
For this group, take your time with the question. What do they enjoy but have not found time to enjoy properly? What have they mentioned twice? Which of their everyday things is slowly wearing out?
Where lists really get stuck
Lists do not get stuck at "who", or at "how much". They get stuck at "what". You know you want something warm and personal, under £40, for someone who likes cooking. But you are looking at a page of ten thousand items, sorted by how many other people bought them.
The task is to reduce ten thousand options to a few good ones, and a list on paper cannot do that. It is the part we built the app for. Tell us who the person is and what you want to spend. Then swipe through gifts that already suit them, so you choose between real options.
The dates to know
Plan backwards from the last posting dates, not from 25 December. Add a few extra days for anything made to order. Small makers are at their busiest exactly when you will be ordering. Our Christmas page counts down to the day, with gift ideas to start your list.
If you finish group three in October, you can spend December choosing gifts for the people you love, without rushing. Done that way, Christmas shopping is actually enjoyable.
Also doing a gift swap at work? Secret Santa gifts people actually keep covers that budget.